1 left… I think they’re right.

(Stealing right out of my brother’s playbook on Instagram, I’ve decided to copy-and-paste an excerpt I posted on another site. A positive precedence seems to merit it.)
This was on a forum, and the question was a hypothetical:
2 pieces of pizza are left… and a dude takes the bigger slice. Do you secretly curse him?
A lot of replies were snarky since the question was kinda trolling in its lack of sincerity… including:
‘No, not secretly.’
‘Fist fight ensues.’
‘No, but I make him also eat the box.’
My reply was more long-winded, as always:


“You know, my mom would beat the crud out of me if I ate the last of anything… teaching me to leave it for someone else… even if there wasn’t anyone else.

I wouldn’t and couldn’t eat the last of anything, be it an Oreo or a slice.

She also taught me to never eat in front of people if I were the only one eating… not to bring food and not bring for everyone.

Ironically, as what goes around comes around… as a kid hungry I would watch this dude… a friend of my stepdad… barge in with a whole bag of Jack In The Box and eat in front of me and my brother…

As well on a missionary trip to rural South Dakota… we had a box of pizza and one slice was left… so of course the large dude in the group ate it without a twinge of conscience.

I just don’t get it.”

“My friend, I think it’s time you start snatching the last piece.”
(*Another responder:)
“You’ve earned it.”
I think they’re right.
I should take what’s left.